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Saturday morning.

Maddie woke up at 12am to eat, and if this was like any other night/morning (last feeding before I went to sleep), she would finish nursing, we'd snuggle each other, and I wouldn't fully fall

asleep until I heard her little piglet snores.

Not this time. She finished nursing. Her belly was full. then she just began to cry. she cried. and she cried. and she cried. 12:30am-6/6:30am.

I want to say it was her acid reflux, but all week long it was not even spoken of, her hurt was no more, we were all claiming it, and loving sleep. I am almost certain that 

Bonnie would even say "Amen!" to that.

(pause)

Being a mom is hard. It's seriously the hardest, but the most rewarding thing I have ever experienced. EVER.

Late night feedings where you can barely keep your eyes open, and dad is just laying there snoring his head off.

Projectile vomit coming at you, then it's running down your shirt, all over your hand(s), because for some reason you thought you could catch all of it... 

then yelling for Dad's help, but in all reality...there is not one thing that he could have done to help, so now he's just standing there staring at you covered in vomit and you want to kick 

him for even coming when you yelled for him! Like he shouldn't have even came when I yelled for him. (...or is this just me?) (Poor Steven. I'm sorry, I love you.)

or dealing with a bb girl who has acid reflux. This is new to me (Bonnie never had reflux problems. was never sick. hardly ever cried. never on anitbotics. never had an ear infections.etc.) so I am 

learning all about this. Learning what it's like to pat your bb's bottom so hard you feel like you could possibly be hurting her, but if you stop patting, she cries. (I still have yet to understand that.) 

Learning that sometimes evening patting her bottom & rocking her like a mad woman (because this is also soothing), isn't going to sooth her, and you just have to listen to her cry, and hurt, 

and (ugg) it's the WORST thing.

or just getting to sleep, after Maddie having one of her hurting episodes, so it's like 4am, and Bonnie crawls in bed with me, and 30 minutes later is vomitting. in our bed. 

it's in her hair. I've not slept. it's 4:30am. I'm getting her cleaned up. vomit is now on me. so we get in the shower. it's 4:55am. and Dad's just laying there.snoring his head off. 

(Good ole' stomach bug.)

these are just a few of my "being a mom is hard" examples.

Steven is such a great dad, and a huge help. Those examples make it seem like he's just always asleep. 

In which he is, because it's 4am, & THAT'S WHEN NORMAL PEOPLE SLEEP! (ahem. Maddie Lou ;))

(play)

Not sure why Maddie was hurting. Nothing at all was helping, or even came close to soothing her.

So I just held bb. & watched. & listened to my sweet tiny girl cry. It was terrible, and I dread nights like that, because like any momma, I just want to help, and make her better.

So while sitting in bed, holding her, listening to her cry. This thought came to me... I need to be thankful in this moment. I need to be thankful that acid reflux is the biggest problem I am dealing with

as a mommy. There are mom's who are dealing with way bigger problems than I. & instead of wanting to punch Steven for sleeping so peacefully, I should be thankful that I get to stay home with 

my girl(s). & that catching up on sleep once Bonnie is off to school is totally do-able. & that I am going to be just fine. 

I've blogged before about throwing pitful pity parties-PPP's (anyone remember?), and I am not at all saying that we (moms) can't feel a certain way, in moments, about certain things, 

because we can, and we will...even if someone told us not to, we will feel how we want! & that is just fine. I just ask that you, & I...that we take a second in our "dark" moments, 

and think how blessed we really are. & how what we are so upset about in that very moment will be something we can laugh about tomorrow (sometimes, not all the time). 

& that's easier said than done, this I know. But Seriously. Are you alive & well? Are your babies healthy? Are you going to make it? Are you bleeding...no? Then go sit down. (did anyones teacher ever tell you that?) 

Let's love life. Love on our babies. Love "moments" we are in, even when don't want to. Love people, even when we don't to. Be a light to others in their dark moments. 

I kinda derailed there, on where I was kinda wanting to go with this blog. =)

anyhow...

Being a mommy is hard at times, and sometimes we don't understand why things happen, or are happening.

God made you a mommy for a reason, and just like anything else, he will never give you something you can't handle.

And how rewarding is it to know that we are needed. Our babies need us, no matter what age.

Mom's rock. That's all.

Now I leave you with this remarkable birth story by Kelle Hampton. I’ve reread it again and again over the period of time since coming across it, and it still impacts me in a profound way. 

So much honesty. Read with tissues. ( I repeat read with tissues) 

& If you don't have time to read it now, please come to it when you do. 

until next time....

BE BLESSED. BE LOVED.

-m.roberts    

Maddie Lou Roberts

Our sweet Maddie Lou was born 4 weeks ago. 

October 2, 2014, weighing in at a whopping 8lbs 4oz, and 21 inches long!

Her birth was nothing that I had in-visioned the 9 months of being pregnant. 

You know me and my OCD... there MUST be a plan for everything,

or else.... well there is no "or else", we go by the plan. 

Minus my all natural labor and delivery I had planned. 

I didn't have an "all natural" labor and delivery, 

I was induced, being that we live 3 hours away (from Lubbock), 

annnd pitocin contractions are dumb (a contraction on crack if you will), 

horrible, 

and every other word used to describe AWFUL, please do feel free to insert. 

HOWEVER, I had the best nurse ever! 

She too is OCD, so we came up with a new plan, and how things would all play out, 

right there in my delivery room. 

It was awesome, and honestly very comforting. 

I still used my oils.

I had my diffuser going the whole entire time. 

My room filled of Lavender, and Jennifer (my nurse) kept getting other nurses to come into my room to experience the spa like feeling she said she got every time she entered into my room. 

Not kidding.

Dr. Belle Henry came in to break my water around 8:45am or so, 

I got my epidural maybe 30-40 minutes following, my mom applied

Clary Sage, & Jasmine onto the lower part of my belly. 

I rubbed Gentle Baby on my chest. 

I went from a 4-10 in 45 minutes, 

pushed 3 times,

and had Maddie Lou Roberts at 10:56am. 

Frankincense was applied to the crown of her head as soon as she was placed onto my chest, by her Maw-B.

Sweet bb girl laid so calm, and cuddled, skin to skin with me. 

"Awww" is right, and just add toasty warm blankets placed on top of us. It was the cherry on top.

Shortly following she started rooting around for her first nursing session with Momma. 

It was beautiful. 

(Breastfeeding use to weird me out, and that is because I breast fed Bonnie Kayte, just for a short period, and it still creeped me out. Now... it is my most favorite thing to do. It is truly amazing to me.)
Dr. Belle- Henry milked the umbilical cord after it stopped pulsating, then Steven cut it. 

Nothing about this day was like I in-visioned, nor on my itinerary (and I'm ok with that), 

but seriously so perfect, and I would do it all again.

Now here we are (Bonnie Kayte, Steven, and I) 4 weeks later, so completely in love with her.

& because I am becoming teary eyed. & Maddie is crying because she is hungry... and well if you breastfeed or have ever, you know what that does to us.

I leave you with pictures for now...

until next time...

follow me on Facebook & instagram!

BE BLESSED. 

BE LOVED.

-malorie lucille

*******

The oils I used during Labor & Delivery:

(I diffused this the whole time I was in the hospital. My nurses loved it.)

-mood balancing

-calms nerves

-sleep aid

-one drop on bb's crown for protection

-promotes bonding

- assist contractions

-kicks labor into gear

(I have even used Clary Sage post L&D for cramping! It's wonderful!)

-reduces anxiety

-calms mom

-expels placenta 

-speeds up contractions

(my favorite. still using it. It's momma, and bb maddie's oil.)

-soothes tender skin

-calms mom & bb

- may keep baby in canal

- use with Gentle Baby on lower back to prevent hemorrhaging.

-use after L&D to eliminate any excess bleeding.

- use on umbilical cord to promote healing

(Maddie's fell off 7 days after leaving the hospital)

__________________

Disclaimer: While I do have a wholesale membership with Young Living Essential Oils, I do not make a business of it, and I have not been compensated in any way for mentioning them in this article. 

This is based on my own experiences with the oils. I can get people to sign up on my team- you buy everything from Young Living, but I would love to help you.

 If you use any other brands of oils, I know that Doterra is another popular name around where I live, 

or if you use just any other good-quality oil, and it works for you, that is fantastic. 

The Young Living vs. Doterra debate is perpetual. 

Find what works for you.

If you are interested in signing up!
 Please message me, email me, call me, comment on this blog, etc.

OR

Here are a few simple steps for you to sign up:

1. Go to https://www.youngliving.com/signup/

2. Sign up as a wholesale member to receive 24% off for life. No need to sell anything ever, but there are some great, life changing, business opportunities if you’re interested.

3. Use my number: 1899911 as the sponsor ID, AND the enroller ID.

4. Fill out your info and select the very first Premium Starter Kit for $150, and you’re set to go!

If you select a different starter kit (the $40 or the $75 one) I want you to be aware that you will only be getting one oil. This does not include the 10 everyday oils, just a few samples.

Please make sure you allow Young Living to send emails so I can contact you and get you connected with other oily family members. Otherwise, I will have no way to reach out to you.

You do not have to select an essential rewards kit unless you want to. I LOVE the Thieves Kit and the NingXia Red kit. It’s a great way to slowly dive into this healthy lifestyle while only spending 50pv a month. The best part- you get free oils!! You can always sign up at a later time as well (you do not have to purchase a kit, you can simply purchase the same products you have been using).

Please email me if you have any questions and I’m so excited to start this journey with you!! We have a great support system so you will never feel alone.

*******

I HOPE YOU CONTINUE TO FOLLOW ME ON MY NEW JOURNEY!!

baby bird #2 (week 39)

How far along: 39 weeks

__________________________________________

Total weight gain/inches: 155 lbs/ 37.5 inches

(total pounds gained: 32 lbs )

(total LBS gained from last week to this week: 3.4 lbs)

(total inches from 2 weeks ago to this week: 1 inch)

Maternity Clothes: maternity tops, and bottoms.

Stretch Marks: still no NEW visible ones. (My whole body has itched soooooo bad this past week!)

Sleep: Sleeping beautifully!

Thank you Young Living Essential Oils.

Best moment this week: Today! It's Wednesday! I had my last NST & OB appointment. Bittersweet.

Miss anything: relaxing comfortable in a hot bath. :) 

Movement: always, always. 

Food/Drink Cravings: Starbucks-Hazelnut Cappuccino... still. :)

Anything make you queasy or sick: Nothing.

Labor signs: contractions (but not constant ones). Dilating (today I was at a 3). Pressure, lots of it!

Symptoms: ready! :)) 

Belly button IN or OUT: OUT.

Wedding rings ON/OFF: BOTH.

Today I did get wear my ring, but my hand swelled, and then I couldn't take it off. 

Happy or Moody: both :)

Looking forward to:

Tomorrow! 

I get to... 

Welcome you!

Love on you!

Cuddle you!

Feed you!

Wrap you!

Cloth diaper you!

-mommy.

(I love you bb bird) 

*******

baby bird #2 (week 38)

How far along: 38 weeks

(38 weeks, day 1)

__________________________________________

Total weight gain/inches: 151.6 lbs/ 36.5 inches
(total pounds gained: 28.6 lbs )
(total LBS gained from last week to this week: 2.4 lbs)
(total inches from 2 weeks ago to this week: 1.5 inches)

Maternity Clothes: maternity tops, and bottoms.

Stretch Marks: still no visible new ones.
 (I've used cocoa butter lotion my entire pregnancy.)

Sleep: Sleeping beautifully!
Thank you Young Living Essential Oils.

Best moment this week: Yesterday!
It was Wednesday!
I am now at 38 weeks,
and yesterday we were 7 (my favorite number) days from you making your appearance.
annnnd I got to see Dr. Gunney.

Miss anything: sitting in comfort. 

Movement: always, always. 

Food/Drink Cravings: Starbucks-Hazelnut Cappuccino... still. :)

Anything make you queasy or sick: Nothing.

Labor signs: lost my mucus plug. contractions (but not constant ones).

Symptoms: pregnant. :)

Belly button IN or OUT: OUT.

Wedding rings ON/OFF: BOTH.
Today I am wearing. 

Happy or Moody: both :)

Looking forward to:
Meeting you!
Loving on you!
Cuddling you!
Feeding you!
Wrapping you!
Cloth diapering you!
6.more.days! :)

-mommy loves.

*******

baby bird #2 (week 37)

How far along: 37 weeks

__________________________________________

Total weight gain/inches: 149.2 lbs/ inches (not sure)
(total pounds gained: 26.2 lbs )
(total LBS gain from last week to this week: 1.2 lbs)
(total inches from last week to this week: ? inch)

Maternity Clothes: maternity tops, and bottoms.

Stretch Marks: still no visible new ones.
 but my belly STILL itches soooo bad this week.
Thankful for coconut oil!

Sleep: Sleeping beautifully!
Thank you Young Living Essential Oils.

Best moment this week: Today! It's Wednesday.
& I get to go see Dr. Gunney.
(Last week I had to see him twice, last Wednesday, and then again last Friday.
I woke up Friday morning, and I could not sit, lay, stand, nothing...
without my lower back having the worst pain I have ever experienced in my life.
I thought I was in labor.
(mind you I don't know what labor pains feel like,
I was induced, and had an epidural with Bonnie Kayte)
So little did I know... my tailbone was all the way off to the left side.
No wonder it hurt to sit.
Immediate relief as soon as he adjusted me.)

Miss anything: Being able to get up on my own. :)   

Movement: always!

Food/Drink Cravings: Fruit. Starbucks-Hazelnut Cappuccino.

Anything make you queasy or sick: Nothing.

Labor signs: None.

Symptoms: just... pregnant. :)

Belly button IN or OUT: OUT.

Wedding rings ON/OFF: BOTH.
(some days it goes on with no struggle, other days I don't even bother!)

Happy or Moody: both :)

Looking forward to:
Meeting you!
Loving on you!
Cuddling you!
Feeding you!
Wrapping you!
Cloth diapering you!
14.more.days! :)

-mommy loves you.

*******

Ohh yes... I got my oils in today!
(minus Gentle Baby)

14 more days :)

baby bird #2 (week 36)

How far along: 36 weeks

21 days to go!

_______________________________________________

Total weight gain/inches: 148 lbs/ 35 inches
(total pounds gained: 25 lbs )
(total LBS gain from last week to this week: 2.2 lbs)
(total inches from last week to this week: 1 inch)

Maternity Clothes: maternity tops, and pants

Stretch Marks: still no visible new ones, but my belly itches soooo bad.
Thankful for coconut oil!

Sleep: Still sleeping beautifully! Thank you Young Living Essential Oils.

Best moment this week: Today! It's Wednesday.
I went in for another adjustment today, so I feel really good.

Miss anything: Being able to get up on my own. :)   

Movement: always

Food Cravings: waffles with a cold glass of milk.

Anything make you queasy or sick: Nothing.

Labor signs: None.

Symptoms: still just... pregnant. :)

Belly button IN or OUT: OUT.

Wedding rings ON/OFF: ON

Happy or Moody: both :)

Looking forward to:
Meeting you!
Loving on you!
Cuddling you!
Feeding you!
Wrapping you!
Cloth diapering you!
and to making a visit to Dr. Gunney (chiropractor) every Wednesday, for the next 3 weeks!

*******