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well hello there! ;)

I have missed you all tons, I've missed sharing my thoughts, sharing my heart, 

sharing...well, just everything!

Where to start.

(this is going to be lengthy, so have a seat there my friend. and I just got my wisdom teeth pulled, yesterday, So i am on meds. ;) haha) 

I'll start off with my move.

My move to Dalhart.

I LOVE it here in Dalhart & that is just the flat out truth! 

As most of you know, I moved here back at the beginning of Decemeber (2011),

I started working for Wells Fargo January 5th.

Somewhere in the mix, I got back together with my ex of almost 2 years, and as MOST of you know we are no longer together, the only good thing I can say about that brilliant idea of mine is..... 

I can NEVER look back on that whole thing and say I didn't try.

From the time I started seeing/dating Dustin.again

was about mid December, 

I slowly drifted away from the Lord, again.

Stopped going to church. again.

Started seeing myself doing things and making decisions that I use to. again.

Heard numerous times from the Lord, and just turned my cheek. again.

I was planning on moving back home, in October when my lease was up. 

to Plainview. 

gulp. again.

(mind you, I do know this is no ones fault but my own.)

Get my vibe. Yaaa, Nuff said right.

Ok, sooo that's all over with, and I can ONLY move forward. 

Right?

Right! 

& I have, or at least I feel like I have.

I'm back in church, seeking the Lords face, daily.

I've Started doing a daily devotion.

& Just really focusing on my relationship with the Lord, 

and focusing on being the BEST mommy that I can be to my sweet girl Bonnie Kayte, 

goodness that little girl blesses me and my life. 

I do not know what I would do without her.

You know it's so crazy to me, how we let life just draw us away from the right path we are on, I mean seriously just like that, BAM...satan steals our thunder, we start living in such a way that is no good for us, and the crazy thing is we KNOW it's no good but still try and pursue it!! 

What the heck! Like I said up there ^ I heard the Lord speak to me over and over and over about how I needed out, I needed out, but I'd put my finger up and just say.....well, just wait Lord, it will get better, just wait Lord, things are gunna change. Ya, well I was totally wrong, once again...Malorie was trying to make things happen in life on her own time, and trying to make things that seemed good (like my relationship) look like it was a "God" thing. 

WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG WRONG!!

I wanted to be seeking the Lord, and that wasn't so much Dustin's heart.

We were running to two separate directions trying to make something out of it. 

and got a BIG. FAT. NOTHING.

So here it is friends. I've thrown in my towel. 

I am so thankful to serve a loving, forgiving, God.

A couple of days before the break up was actually official and let be. haha.

Ummm, I had this awful guilt I was I was caring around, 

it went a little something like this...

(how on earth am I ever going to be forgiven this time, I mean seriously Malorie, you heard from the Lord, NUMEROUS times, turned your cheek and went on about your OWN ways and doings, for what drug on and on for about two years. and all you feel now, is guilty, shame etc.)

Then I heard this brilliant word from this brilliant lady.... and her exact words were,

God doesn't want you to carry guilt around. 

He wants you to repent. 

receive his forgiveness. 

& Go on about your business.

The bible teaches us NOT to be conformed of this world.

easier said than done. but it really can be that easy my friends.

those things listed above, repent, receive, and let go and go about your business.

fair enough. easy enough. 

right?

So I did just that.

The past 5 weeks I've learned that people tend to make this "religion" thing so hard to understand and so hard to grasp, when in all reality it's not about "religion".

Religion is complicated. Jesus is simple.

life isn't meant to be complicated, taking matters in your own hands like Malorie did... 

makes life complicated.

God wants us to enjoy life. 

God wants us to be happy, to laugh, to love, and to stay focused.

We can do it. If I can do it. You can do it.

*******

So there is what happened in the time frame from my official move back in December, 

till about 4 weeks ago.

Let's see what else haven't I shared...

*******

Of course Bonnie Kayte was with me for January, February, & March.

We had so much fun in our little apartment together, we had a daily routine, she kept me on my toes, she wanted to eat pasta (our favorite. every night, then I tried to explain to her that mommy can't eat pasta every night because it sticks in places and I have to work out even harder, she didn't really understand, sooo therefore, we had pasta a lot. haha)

 she was my little mini me. I love it. Some nights we would stay up talking for hours, about absolutely nothing, like...her baby doll Patricia, she wasn't listening to her mommy (Bonnie), crazy girl.

& Everyday after school, we'd race from the car to the apartment, 

she won EVERY.DAY!

Then she went with her dad, for the months of April, May and June, and I sure do miss her!

Needless to say, I look forward to every other weekend I have with her.

she is my princess.

*******

Oh, the last week of March, I started working out.

I did Zumba everyday for the first 3-4 weeks and slowly stopped for some reason.

I do run a mile or more everyday thou. 

I work out my bum, legs, and arms.

I'm not trying to lose weight, 

I just want to be fit and do some toning is all, 

I have never been much of a self motivator, 

but beings that I am on WEEK 5 (whoop whoop)

 of pushing myself

ev.er.y.day! 

I'll go ahead and swallow those words, 

it's tuff, but I always feel so accomplished after a work out. 

I've also found that during this time, I really meditate and talk to the Lord.
 a lot.

it's very relaxing.

& very nice.

*******

Let's see what else.

I have started attending church regularly, again.

started getting plugged in to Group on friday nights, again.

I am actually attending a Women's Encounter this weekend, 

I'm pretty pumped and excited for that.

*******

I've met a new friend,
guy friend,
named Jared.

he's pretty special to me.

He let's me talk,
haha & If you know me,
you knooooooow I like to talk.

He listens.

He gives advice.

& He has an amazing heart.

I met him the first weekend of April, so we haven't known each other for that long.

He offered to take me to my appointment yesterday to have all four wisdom teeth pulled,

he is a pretty good nurse, and good picture taker if I do say so myself.

his BEFORE of me.
waiting.
patiently in the waiting room.

 (little sneaky)

haha. and his AFTER of me. 

going to check sprinklers with him, is always fun too!

haha!

*******

I had started a book awhile back,

like back in Jan. but never finished it...

so I'm working on that....

it's called,

"Your Captivating Heart"

by Stasi Eldredge

"Discover How God's True Love Can Free a Woman's Soul"

very neat book.
i'm learning a lot from it!

*******

I went and watched the movie

"The Lucky One"

this past Sunday.

very good movie!
must see!!!

*******

and that my friends is a wrap....for now!!

I promise. pinkie promise to do better!!

So until next time,

LOVE YOU ALL!!

&

like always

BE BLESSED. BE LOVED!!!

(and if you would please post your comments on the facebook blogger page, not on here, not everyone knows how to post or view the comments on here!! thank you!!!)

*******

listen to--> free by: Dara Maclean

listen to the amazing lyrics! love this song!